There's a saying thanks to the aviation industry there's a saying "put your oxygen mask on first before helping someone else. People use that phrase quite often when talking about how women will put their families before themselves. I get that. At some point, you have to refill yourself, or you won't be good to anyone else. At the same time though, as a mother, so much of them is your oxygen. That need to check on them while they're sleeping, the thing that makes you double check that they have everything they need, that feeling you get once you KNOW that they're ok, those are the things that keeps us breathing, that keeps us moving forward. That is our oxygen.
A friend posted a link to Karrine Steffan's blog where she talks about her love for Lil Wayne (there's a sentence I never thought I'd type). I believe people want love to be clean, to have perforated edges, to belong in these compartments. But love doesn't work like that. Love is sloppy. It doesn't stay between the lines. There are bonds that link us. And once formed, those links are hard to break. This is why people find themselves wondering what if, or contemplating old loves, and going back to those people who didn't treat them right to start with. Love isn't logical, it doesn't make sense. But you know it when it happens, when you and someone else just fit. Even if the fit is wrong. I'm not condoning anything, nor do I think that it is smart. But love isn't smart.