Saturday, May 11, 2013

Mother's Day Wishes

11:52 PM

When you're going through infertility, Mother's Day can take on a different meaning than it does for everyone else.   Sometimes, despite how hard you try to fight it, Mother's Day can be a dangerous day.  It seems as though everyone is a mother but you, and that sentiment starts a dangerous spiral.  

I wish I had magical words to say, words of encouragement that would make things better.   But I don't.  There's nothing I could say that hasn't already been said.  Nothing I could try to convey that wouldn't sound forced or dismissive.

All I have is this.  The part of you that is hurting, the part of you that feels empty, the part of you that is aching is the part of you that IS a mother.  Not mother-like.  A mother.  That part of you will be the same part that is happy to watch them sleep, the part that makes you do checks in the middle of the night, the part of you that won't let you breathe until you know that they're ok, the part that will relish every hug, every kiss.  It's okay to let the mother in you be sad.  The bitterness of moments like these will make things all the sweeter when the mother in you becomes the mother everyone else can see too.

Happy Mother's Day.  Keep up the fight - you're fighting to get to meet someone you've loved for as long as you can remember, even if they don't exist yet.  It's the most honorable fight in the world.

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  1. Not re-reading this. I do not cry my own tears. I do NOT!


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