So here are the Top 10 Reasons Huck Should Be My Boyfriend:
10. I've got a little stalker in me. Well, that's not true. I've got a lot of stalker in me. Her name is Consuela and she's really good at tracking people down via the internet. Consuela has never showed up in anyone's bushes, although she'd really like to. I'm sure Huck can help with that.
9. Huck is really good friends with Olivia. I need to have a little conversation with Olivia and he could probably arrange that. I would tell you what I want to talk to Liv about, but then Huck would have to kill you.
8. We both enjoy things that we shouldn't. I really like buffalo wings. And bacon. And pizza. And Vitner's Hot Crunchy Cheese Kurls, and tacos and more bacon. Oh and cheese. And Olive Garden which isn't really an Italian Restaurant, but I'm okay with that. He likes killing people. See, common ground.
7. He's loyal to his friends. That's an awesome trait.
6. He's not judgmental. He knows Liv is sleeping with Fitz. No judgement. He knows everyone's secrets yet he never seems to hold them against anyone.
5. Huck is a master computer hacker. He can break into super secure national databases and trace untraceable money transfers. I don't need all of that. I could use a little help with Trans Union, Equifax and Experian though. That shouldn't be too much for him to handle.
4. The Zombie Apocolypse is coming. Huck could totally handle zombies, no problem. As long as it is not raining. Me and Huck will have to live in Vegas or something where the chances of rain are smaller. Rainy-day Huck would totally get our brains liquified or whatever zombies do.
3. Huck can obtain and figure out anything. He's got connections. Why, I'm sure he could even get Beyonce tickets.
2. Huck needs lots of hugs. I like to cuddle.
1. No one could ever mess with me ever. I'd totally be like Cyrus. Cut me off on the highway - sniped. Don't accept my Kohls cash because it expired yesterday - sniped. Try to overcharge me for my car repairs - sniped. Oh and by sniped, I mean written a strongly worded letter (no I don't)