Scandal Post: Unaswered Questions

I know a lot of people loved last week’s Scandal.  They thought it was fabulous.  I was so looking forward to a SURPRISE!!!!  I think the traitor was obvious, but the mole was unexpected mostly because I thought he was dead/in jail.  Guess not.  

Here are some of my unanswered questions:

1. Now that we know David was playing everyone, does he know about Liv and Fitz?  Could he have been playing stupid about their relationship or did he really not know who Fitz was cheating with?     
2. While talking to “Earl” we learn that part of Jake’s mission was to get between Liv and Fitz.  That means “Earl” knew about Fitz and Liv.  Does this also mean that Jake’s dive between Liv’s magical thighs was just to fulfill his mission?
3. Everyone seems to be afraid to play the Olivia Card with Fitz.  Mellie didn’t name Olivia because Fitz would hate her.  Cyrus didn’t tell Fitz about Jake and Olivia because Cy would hate him.  Does Fitz have some magical unicorn capabilities that we don’t know about?  Or is it really the office of president that is most important to Mellie and Cyrus.
4. Liv gets a lot of phone calls.  And whenever she hangs up and her phone rings immediately she always assumes the person is calling her back.  This is almost always a bad idea.  You’d think after the first few times she’d stop that.  Checking the caller ID isn’t that hard is it? 
5. Everyone say how David reacted when he learned the Citron card still existed, yet no one thought it was weird that he wanted to stay behind alone in the office?

“Earl” is my name for Jake’s contact, we still don’t know his name, so I call him Earl. 

What do you think?

Walking Solo

One of my biggest character flaws is a difficulty asking for help. In fact, the majority of my "oops" moments have been a result of me not seeking help when I should have.

It's like I have a running tape in my head that's telling me:

-You are the only one that is looking out for you
- When push comes to shove, you've got to be in your own corner
- No one is going to help you
- You've got to stand on your own
- You carry your own burdens

I've done a decent job of turning that sound track down. I won't lie and say that I've muted it, but it's there and I have really good hearing.

Today I was caught off guard by someone else's truth about me. No necessarily THE truth, but their truth. And it stung. Well, that's putting it mildly, it burned.

I promptly turned that sound track back up. And I don't think it's a bad thing. That says a lot. I'm not as reformed as I thought. And maybe reformation isn't always a good thing.

Mother's Day Wishes

When you're going through infertility, Mother's Day can take on a different meaning than it does for everyone else.   Sometimes, despite how hard you try to fight it, Mother's Day can be a dangerous day.  It seems as though everyone is a mother but you, and that sentiment starts a dangerous spiral.  

I wish I had magical words to say, words of encouragement that would make things better.   But I don't.  There's nothing I could say that hasn't already been said.  Nothing I could try to convey that wouldn't sound forced or dismissive.

All I have is this.  The part of you that is hurting, the part of you that feels empty, the part of you that is aching is the part of you that IS a mother.  Not mother-like.  A mother.  That part of you will be the same part that is happy to watch them sleep, the part that makes you do checks in the middle of the night, the part of you that won't let you breathe until you know that they're ok, the part that will relish every hug, every kiss.  It's okay to let the mother in you be sad.  The bitterness of moments like these will make things all the sweeter when the mother in you becomes the mother everyone else can see too.

Happy Mother's Day.  Keep up the fight - you're fighting to get to meet someone you've loved for as long as you can remember, even if they don't exist yet.  It's the most honorable fight in the world.

Getting Clean - Ivory® 2-IN-1 Hair & Body Wash

As women, we have a lot going on in our lives.  We've got to take care of us, our menfolk, our kids, our parents, our friends, or jobs (see how far down that was), church obligations, book clubs, parent groups, kids activities, etc, etc and so on.  We're the keepers of the home, often responsible for groceries, household goods, personal care items everything.  And as women, we surely do have more than our fair share of personal care items.   A friend and I joke all the time about how cluttered the dreaded "under sink" can get

Not my sink!!!

Ivory has come out with a product to help with the clutter, and to make things easier on we busy women. 

Rub a dub dub

To be honest, I was a bit weary of the shampoo/body wash combo.  I loved the scent, and I loved it as a body wash, but could a product for my body really work for my hair?   Short answer, yes.   I rocked my curly fro for a week, and the Ivory 2-in-1 did a great job of cleaning my hair while not depleting it of moisture.  I really like it as a body wash too.  It's a time saver, no more fumbling through products under the sink.  And it's good for everyone, mom, dads and the kids


 So grab a bottle and take the challenge

Want to know more?  You can check them their videos and Facebook page

Disclaimer: I received this product to try at no cost from Influenster.  I was not paid to write this review, the words and opinions above are mine. 

What's In My Head

Oxygen

There's a saying thanks to the aviation industry there's a saying "put your oxygen mask on first before helping someone else.  People use that phrase quite often when talking about how women will put their families before themselves.  I get that.  At some point, you have to refill yourself, or you won't be good to anyone else.  At the same time though, as a mother, so much of them is your oxygen.   That need to check on them while they're sleeping, the thing that makes you double check that they have everything they need, that feeling you get once you KNOW that they're ok, those are the things that keeps us breathing, that keeps us moving forward.  That is our oxygen.

Puzzle Pieces

A friend posted a link to Karrine Steffan's blog where she talks about her love for Lil Wayne (there's a sentence I never thought I'd type).  I believe people want love to be clean, to have perforated edges, to belong in these compartments.  But love doesn't work like that.  Love is sloppy.  It doesn't stay between the lines.  There are bonds that link us.  And once formed, those links are hard to break.  This is why people find themselves wondering what if, or contemplating old loves, and going back to those people who didn't treat them right to start with.  Love isn't logical, it doesn't make sense.  But you know it when it happens, when you and someone else just fit.   Even if the fit is wrong.  I'm not condoning anything, nor do I think that it is smart.  But love isn't smart. 

C25K - Week 1 Day 0

Source: wellandcheaply.com

 I attempted the first Couch to 5K workout today.  All of the workouts are roughly 30 minutes.    Today's broke down like this

 - 5 minute warm up walk
 - 1 minute jog & 1.5 minute walk (8 times)
 - 5 minute cool down walk

I made a bunch of mistakes today:

• Wrong apparel 
• Attempting to jog in ill fitting draws is a poor life decision.  Jogging, outside, in front of the public is difficult when your underpants are under your under.
• I wore a regular bra.  Nuff said.
• I underestimated the workout
• I was pretty confident today's workout should be 29 minutes of walking with about 43 seconds of jogging.  That was a set up. 
• I chose the wrong music
• I set Pandora to Britney Spears.  Don't judge me!  Britney has some great workout music.  Or did.  I should've gone with Beyonce. 

To be honest, I didn't do the whole jogging thing.  I mean I started to jog a couple of times but yeah.  I did walk the whole time.  Well, almost the whole time.  I kind of bailed on the cool down.   So, this doesn't count.  We'll try this again tomorrow. 

Couch to Bed or 5K or Something

In the past week, I've lost three pounds (Woo Hoo)! I seem to be on the mend from the super cooties Ladybug brought home and finally seem to have some energy again. 

I've been thinking about running for a long time. Several years ago, I had dinner with one of my mentors.  I was looking for career advice and hadn't seen him in a couple of years.   When I saw him, I was shocked!  He'd lost a ton of weight.  He told me he'd taken up running, and had run his first half marathon.    I thought to myself, if he could do it, I could do it.  He was probably 25 years older than me and I figured I could do it too.  (stop laughing) 

In my infinite wisdom, I hooked up with a trainer.  Someone who was very familiar with running.  My brother, who was fresh out of the Marines.  Fresh.  Out.  Fresh!!!!!  We started running, and  running and although I wasn't good at it, it didn't suck that much.  Or so I thought.    After a while, my calves started killing me. Like on fire.  I tried to explain it to my trainer, but he reacted like a Marine.  And I reacted like a hormonal woman. And that was the end of training.  I saw my doctor a little while later who diagnosed me with doing too much too fast.  That was like 7 years ago. LOL. 

I like the thought of running.  I don't like the actual running part, or at least I don't think I do.  Jethro asked me what part don't I like, to which I responded "the part where you run".  That all being said, I'm constantly inspired by those that do run, so I'm trying to get into the game.  I downloaded a Couch to 5K app and I'm going to see how I do.  Anything has to be better than Couch to Bed like I have been doing. 

I want to be around to meet Ladybug's grandchildren, that's going to require some better life choices on my part. 

She certainly likes running